the most harmful belief in work culture is that trying harder is the magic spell for earning more money.
this is harmful not only because it builds up heart attack levels of stress…
but because it doesn’t fvcking work—not in 2023.
if you follow boomer advice:
“show up early, stay late and show your boss you’ll work harder than anyone else on the payroll.”
it’s more likely than ever your employer will bleed you dry then replace you when you run out of juice.
between 1970 and 1980, roughly 17 million U.S. employees quit or were fired from their jobs.
but looking at 2022 alone that number had skyrocketed to 66 million.¹ ²
there’s no such thing as a “job for life” any more.
and for a long time employing yourself was no easier.
from 2007-2016 i worked as a freelance musician.
like clockwork i burned out every few months.
even as my own boss i associated hurting myself with earning money.
and just like everyone else, i wore my pain as a badge of honour.
“yep, played 3 shows back-to-back this weekend on no sleep.”
survivorship bias has us idolizing self-confessed workaholics who need drugs to function normally. ³
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i ended up sore, stressed, and emotionally bankrupt.
i used to lie on my ex-girlfriend’s hardwood floor and have her put her entire weight on my spine like a kind of poor man’s chiropractic treatment. (this probably made things worse in retrospect. but it did make my spine click.)
in 2015 i took my first holiday in 10 years. this was the longest i’d been away from a drum kit since i started playing in 1998.
“this is just what i need, i thought. “2 weeks of rest and i’ll be back on top.”
but i felt exactly the same when i got home.
there was only one thing left to do: i had to bite the bullet and seek external support.
so i went to an actual chiropractor, who recommended i see an Alexander Technique teacher.
but i couldn’t afford the chiropractor, let alone another expert.
still, this was my only hope. so i found more work—inviting more pain in the short term—in hopes of finding the answers i wanted long-term.
Alexander Technique, in a nutshell, teaches people to stop doing things in harmful ways.
through my study and practice of this fascinating discipline i experienced an unexpected benefit—i stopped procrastinating.
now, one thing i’d been procrastinating on was listening to more Alan Watts.
and it was listening to Alan that led me to my first mindfulness teacher, a senior monk in the Theravada Buddhist tradition. (i shared his top 3 lessons on happiness last week.)
i was skeptical of bringing a third expert into my life, but i still didn’t have the answers i wanted. so i swallowed hard and dove in…
studying with my monk friend (and practising mindfulness for almost 30,000 hours) i finally figured out how to be at peace.
but he presented another problem.
as a good Theravadin, this guy was heavy into renunciation (AKA “giving stuff up”). and the most important thing to give up, in his view, was money.
at the same time he was encouraging me to start teaching mindfulness myself.
“you know i live in the UK, right?” i said. “rent’s no joke here.”
“the buddha and his monks survived on generosity,” he’d say.
“yeah, in ancient India,” i’d think as i bit my tongue out of respect.
i tried to teach mindfulness for free for two years.
during lockdown i uploaded 72 talks & guided meditations to an app called Insight Timer.
Insight Timer pays its teachers like Spotify pays musicians. (0.00-something of a cent per play.)
i ran the numbers.
i needed 3 million unique plays per month to cover rent. i was at around 1500.
meanwhile, i was coaching mindfulness students around my work as a musician.
but everything else in my life was neglected…
first i stopped seeing friends.
then i stopped seeing family.
then i stopped performing.
what do you do when someone needs help?
i taught over 1000 music students throughout my career. most of them just came for something to do in the evenings. few of them practiced between lessons.
more and more often, a mindfulness student would call during those lessons. but i couldn’t answer. my phone would buzz in my pocket and i’d know someone on the other end really needed me. but i was held up guiding my music student through material they hadn’t practiced (again).
when i called my mindfulness students back i’d hear all kinds of things. sometimes they’d had some amazing insight in meditation they wanted to run by me. or they had a deep question about the nature of existence.
but sometimes their partner had left them. or they’d had a panic attack. or they’d lost their job.
more and more i encountered this choice regarding who i gave my attention to.
teaching drums was a great job, but those people didn’t need me.
meanwhile, my mindfulness students were dealing with life-changing sh!t and were desperate for guidance.
i had 3 choices:
- keep teaching drums and leaving my mindfulness students hanging
- quit teaching drums, serve my mindfulness students for free and become homeless
- create a business around teaching mindfulness and upset my teacher
i suspect this looks like a no-brainer to you, dear reader, but an ingredient i can’t fully express in writing is just how much respect i had for that teacher of mine.
i deliberated on this matter for a whole year, fearing i’d never reconcile my “spiritual” life with my “worldly” life.
meanwhile, i learned of people who had done exactly that and achieved huge success.
Steve Jobs said to Playboy magazine in 1985, “Zen has been a deep influence in my life… At one point I was thinking about going to Japan and trying to get into the Eihei-ji monastery, but my spiritual advisor urged me to stay here.”
and Phil Jackson, 11-time NBA champion coach, wrote a whole book on how spirituality informed his incredible work.
now, Steve certainly wasn’t teaching spirituality like i was aspiring to do. Phil’s case is debatable. but what they both had was something i didn’t: alignment.
they were both right where they needed to be; where other people needed them to be.
people were calling me to be elsewhere than my music studio, but i wasn’t taking that call.
single perspective is too narrow in the 21st century
i explored other spiritual teachings during that time. and i discovered other teachers speaking with just as much conviction as mine did, but on different advice. many, indeed, advocated for embracing modern business practices around spiritual teaching.
i reconsidered my position again and again until it became clear: i was having to try really fvcking hard to keep money out of the picture. mindfulness students, at this point, were practically begging me to take payment so they could speak to me more often.
there was simply more benefit all around in my embracing money. only one person would be upset: my teacher. and this was going to have to be okay.
for the first part of my life i tried to sacrifice wellbeing for wealth.
then i sacrificed wealth for wellbeing.
eventually it became clear that neither of these extremes were optimal.
it was time to come to balance. and as i did, i discovered a kind of effectiveness i never could’ve predicted.
as i built my new business on the principle of mutual benefit i found i didn’t have to hurt myself to get a lot done.
the work was so deeply aligned that i didn’t have to crack the whip on myself to inspire action:
🔹 i wanted to do outreach
🔹 i wanted to get up at 5am to write these newsletters
🔹 i wanted to sit on long calls with students investigating their issues and helping them with their practice
i was more productive than ever and i wasn’t even trying.
zero friction.
zero stress.
zero anxiety.
and it wasn’t long before i started earning more money than i ever had.
for 15 years i’d huffed and puffed trying to increase my earnings as a musician.
in march 2023 i launched my first mindfulness cohort course and earned over $10,000 in a single week.
and all without a drop of sweat.
running this business is like an ongoing meditation.
and sharing this way of operating with my students has been one of their favourite aspects of our work together:
🔹 i’ve helped high-ticket sales reps increase their figures
🔹 i’ve helped managers unite their teams
🔹 i’ve helped entrepreneurs set up new impactful businesses of their own
you can watch those students talk about their experiences right here.
the science of mindful money
what if you could measure the ROI of mindfulness on the same spreadsheet where you track your monthly revenue?
the science suggests you’d like what you’d see.
“Existing research on mindfulness has established that mindfulness can improve work performance, reduce turnover intentions, etc. (Dane and Brummel, 2014), help employees understand themselves and others, and improve work engagement (Federman, 2009; Kahn, 2010).”⁴
mindful employees are more likely to come up with effective problem solving strategies tailored to the current situations (Shapiro et al., 2012). Additionally, high acceptance of the reality without judgment helps employees detach their self images from their work (Brown et al., 2007; Charoensukmongkol, 2017; Kroon et al., 2017).⁵
of course, these improvements lead to wealth.
if you’re a freelancer or an entrepreneur, even moreso—because you tend to be working on projects that are more aligned with your core values.
but how, exactly, does this work?
you’ve read my story.
you’ve heard how all this has helped others.
but how will it help you?
what is “spirituality” really about?
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the model in this diagram is best explained in reverse order: level 3 to level 0.
imagine you’re watching a TV.
at level 3, you’re completely immersed in the show, feeling what the characters are feeling.
at level 2, you’re zoomed out a notch and you know you’re watching a show. this is the level at which you’d comment subconsciously on what’s happening. (e.g. “run! run!”)
at level 1, you’re aware of your thoughts and feelings about the show. this is where a more sophisticated critique can take place. (in psychology terms this is called metacognition—the quality of being aware of your own mental processes.)
at level 0, you recognize that all of this—the TV show, the characters in it, the TV set, the light and sound it emits, you, your thoughts and feelings, your impressions of the show and any comments you might make—is included in the basic space of awareness with no real boundaries between any of it.
level 0 is the ultimate vantage point, though it may not seem significant in the context of a TV show.
but if you consider how this perspective might aid you in a difficult conversation at work the benefits become clear.
would you rather be immersed in the conversation, reacting emotionally?
would you wish to merely be aware that you’re having a conversation? (this may help you be a little less reactive.)
would you prefer to be aware of your thoughts as you engage in the conversation? (now we’re getting somewhere…)
or would you rather see that the whole picture of what’s going on is nothing but a series of impersonal appearances, coming and going in the vast, non-judgmental space of awareness, which is naturally wise in that it knows everything just as it is?
at level 0 nothing gets past you. you’re aware of all your thoughts and feelings. you’re aware of tiny facial expressions and body language in the other person. you’re aware of the broader context of the conversation. you’re aware of the potential consequences of what you might say. you’re aware of the other person’s motivations. you see everything just as it is, you remain cool as a cucumber, and you naturally respond in ways that benefit both parties.
i know this might sound trippy so let’s ground it a bit.
a powerful parallel between ancient wisdom and psychology
“I recall once, when I was sitting in the cool shade of a rose-apple tree, then—quite secluded from sensuality, secluded from unskillful qualities—I entered & remained in the first jhāna: rapture & pleasure born of seclusion, accompanied by directed thought & evaluation… That is the path to awakening.” - Buddha, Mahā Saccaka Sutta (MN 36)
“In flow, we are so focused on the task at hand that everything else falls away. Action and awareness merge. Time flies. Self vanishes. All aspects of performance go through the roof.” “Flow is an optimal state of consciousness where we feel our best and perform our best.” - Steven Kotler, Executive Director of the Flow Research Collective
i’ll let you draw your own conclusions on whether the Buddha and the world’s leading expert on flow state may have been talking about the same—or at least a similar—way of being.
what i’ll add is that all the words above describe accurately the vast majority of my waking moments. the one exception being that “all aspects of performance” aren’t through the roof when i’ve been writing for 9 hours. (that’s time enough for anyone to deserve a rest.)
students of mine report more and more time spent in this condition too. but not because they’re developing a new set of skills to apply. they enjoy this increasing focus and effectiveness because they’re learning how to relax.
this tells us something important: focus and effectiveness are our natural state.
in other words, when we get out of our own way, cool sh!t happens.
i’m not the only one advocating for mindfulness in business
i’m still building my business, but many with more worldly success than myself advocate for mindfulness.
“The more you schedule and practice the art of non-doing, the more you get done.” - Tim Ferriss
“Meditation, more than any other factor, has been the reason for whatever success I’ve had.” - Ray Dalio
“The more we introduce mindfulness practices into our lives, the more we’re able to live life instead of endure it.” - Arianna Huffington
“This practice [mindfulness] has allowed me to create an open space in my mind that prevents problems from taking over and allows me to think clearly.” - Marc Benioff
“The gift of learning to meditate is the greatest gift you can give yourself in this lifetime.” - Oprah Winfrey
“I meditate every day and I usually do it for ten or fifteen minutes in the morning, as that prepares me to face whatever comes next.” - Kobe Bryant
time for a taste of your real earning potential
the best way i can make all this real for you is to guide you through a meditation:
a powerful way to proceed with all this is to run an experiment.
could it be that your earning potential is greater when you relax?
i found this question too exciting to ignore, and i’m profoundly happy with the answer i discovered.
your journey is your own.
maybe you’ll crack the whip another few years before you burn out.
everyone does in the end.
bullying yourself isn’t a sustainable strategy for wealth generation (nor anything else).
whenever you’re ready to give this a try, i’ll be here to help.
i’ll be back next week with another insight.
with love from my sofa,
dg 💙
P.S. if you need guidance on all this, click here.